


Home

by tothetrashwhereibelong



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Loves Magnus Bane, Bottom Magnus Bane, Hurt/Comfort, In a way, M/M, Magnus Bane Loves Alec Lightwood, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Reunion Sex, Top Alec Lightwood, Trans Magnus Bane, alec just loves him so much, i feel like that's it, is that it, magnus is very emotional, mild impact play, post-Edom, the feelings are the plot, use of the c word to describe a trans man's genitals, we deserved to have malec reunion sex god damn it, woah
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2019-09-23
Packaged: 2020-10-26 23:02:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20750210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tothetrashwhereibelong/pseuds/tothetrashwhereibelong
Summary: Magnus can't believe he's home. It's barely been days since he was in Edom, but he still can't believe it.He never thought he'd see this again - his loft, his books, his cats. Alec.He's still not sure he really has it back, but it's ok. Alec will help him see it.





	Home

**Author's Note:**

> Uh english is not my first language and i beta'd this super fast because i have to run to class but i really wanted to post this so yeah. also this was accidentally inspired by an anon on tumblr, so, uh, whoever you are, this is for you

It doesn’t hit him until he steps out of the portal that he made into his loft; not until he drops on his couch and stares at the yellow walls, at the array of books left disorganized and the scattered remnants of a potion now forgotten. And even then, it doesn’t really hit him as a realization, but rather as a bone-deep tiredness, the exhaustion from the day catching up to him right when he thought he was taking a breath.

_I’m home._

He didn’t think he would see home again; and funnily enough, that, of all things, was something he thought about during the time he was in Edom: he didn’t even get to say goodbye to it, to mourn it properly. His life, his freedom, the air of a world that wasn’t made of darkness and memories of torture. His home. _His_ home.

His _home_.

Of course, the last time he was here, he didn’t know he was facing the possibility of not coming back; he was actually very much planning on being back, and soon, preferably on his bedroom with Alexander behind him. But of course, getting your boyfriend-slash-not-really-fiancé back after banishing your evil demon father who schemed for you to break up just couldn’t be that simple. Go figure.

Still, if he had known it would have been the last time-

But it wasn’t, was it?

“I’m _home_,” he says, and blinks, so fast it almost makes him dizzy; afraid to have his eyes closed for too long, lest everything is taken away from him in his distraction again.

“You are,” Alexander says, simply, sitting down beside him. It’s not really a _flop_ like Magnus’, but it’s not graceful, either. It’s an emotionless move; direct and to the point. The means to an end.

Magnus looks at him, aware that his eyes are probably displaying all of the emotion his brain won’t allow him to process right now. He doesn’t care. He just wants to look at him, at his ruffled hair, his lopsided smile, his eyes. 

Alexander is looking at him in a way that’s more fit for the moon and stars; the kind of look that’s reserved for a beauty so impossible that acknowledging it is almost an act of resignation. He looks at Magnus in awe, surrender, affection; but rather than intense, it’s peaceful. Sweet. Vulnerable in a way only the protected can be.

“I’m home,” he repeats, cupping Alec’s face with his hands, and he knows there’s something showing in his eyes, too, a wonder so deep it’s more of a mix between love and fear. He feels it like it’s stuck to the back of his skull, not hiding, but holding itself so as not to spill. 

“You are,” Alec answers, taking his hand in his and raising it delicately to his lips, kissing the inside of his wrist. Magnus can feel the blood rushing through the veins there, can feel the proof that he’s alive. He’s flooded by it in a way that’s completely incompatible with the gentleness of Alec’s touch.

"Alec," Magnus says, like he's wounded, like he's breathless, like a part of him is missing. He can’t choke out a full “Alexander”; it would feel too much like letting go.

"Magnus," Alec answers, sounding firm like the support Magnus would need in order to allow himself to shake.

He launches himself onto Alec like he’s going to attack him, rip him apart with his hands just to make sure he’s made of flesh. He holds him like he wants to swallow him, hands clutching to Alec’s back in an almost-imitation of the reunion hug that they didn’t get to complete. It’s a sharp contrast with the way _Alec_ holds him, hands on the back of his head so steady, hold on him firm as he takes Magnus to straddle his lap, so they can be close, close like they have been wanting to be for the last 48 hours, and inhales like he wants to make the sandalwood a permanent part of him. Alec holds him with ease and steadiness, like this is where his peace lies, like Magnus is sheltering him from the launches of emotions he himself is experiencing right now.

Alec is firm, and Magnus shakes.

“Alec,” he says again, hands allowing itselves it explore, to press at the back of Alec’s neck lightly, to follow the path of his spine, to remap his body like he’s afraid he’ll find a part missing. He’s all there, from the soft strands of his hair to the hard line of his back, his calloused hands on Magnus’ scalp, his aura a comfort. “Alec. _Alexander_,” he manages, and doesn’t fall, but still feels like Alexander catches him.

“Shh, it’s okay, Magnus, it’s okay,” Alec says, starting to pet his head, hand wrapped protectively around his waist, and it’s almost surreal to have him there like this, when not too long ago Magnus was holding unto him to try not to let him escape.

“I _know_,” Magnus says, “but I can’t _feel_ it.”

Alec makes a wounded noise, like that of all things is what’s going to break him. He plants a kiss on the top of Magnus’ head, and lets his hands rub and touch Magnus’ whole back. When Magnus pulls away from his chest just slightly, Alec immediately moves the kisses to his face, butterfly kisses that shouldn’t feel as intense as they do, fast and short but making Magnus feel like they’re marking him with light. He breathes in as Alec kisses his forehead, cheeks, nose, jawline, and breathes out by immediately deepening the kiss when Alec reaches just the corner of his lips.

He pours everything into it, his whole body, holding Alec’s head against his as he moves almost frantically. Alec lets him, lets him take whatever he wants, holds him steady as Magnus deepens the kiss like this is the only way he can reach Alec. It feels good, to not be the one to give for once, to have Alec be there for him.

With him? 

Does the distinction matter? 

Does the distinction exist?

He grinds his hips against Alec’s without even noticing, and still doesn’t feel the need to pull away for breath. He strokes Alec’s neck almost carefully, the way he knows gives him goosebumps, and when he feels Alec getting hard against his thigh, he moans.

It feels good to let himself take, but he wants to be taken, too. 

“Alec,” he says again when he pulls away from the kiss, like it’s the only word he remembers. He lets his forehead rest against Alec’s, breathing heavily, and he knows he’s speed-running through every kind of touch he can possibly think of, but he can’t help it. 

“Magnus, don’t you want to-” 

“Just want you,” he says, eyes still closed, feeling the warmth of Alec’s embrace and hearing their mingled, heavy breaths. “I know, I know we should talk, and we will, I promise we will, but-” he opens his eyes, “you’re here.”

Alec nods like any of this made sense, and he knows Alec feels it too, doesn’t need Magnus to explain because they’re connected by these feelings. They’re in sync again, and Alec’s got him, and gods, Magnus loves him.

“I love you.” 

It takes him a minute to say “I love you” back, not because he doesn’t feel it, but because he thought the words had come from his own mouth. 

“I love you too, Alexander,” he says when he realizes, “want you, just, need you right now.”

“Okay,” Alec says, cupping his face again. “Okay,” and kisses him again.

This time, Alec is enthusiastically giving back, and Magnus feels himself breathe when he doesn’t need to _ask_ for it anymore. It feels good, to rely on Alec, to let him take care of him, to trust him to be there for him. He should have known, should have known Alec would always want to give Magnus whatever he wanted, but somehow he had managed to forget that in these past few days.

But now Alec is here, kissing him back, stroking his back and holding him impossibly close, and their kiss deepens and deepens and Magnus can feel all of himself, his body and his magic and his mind, the rush of blood through him, the relief that he’s been craving for so long. And Alec, warm and solid, lips chapped and tongue smooth and voice rough when Magnus rolls his hips and Alec _groans_, and the moan Magnus lets out feels almost as good as the feeling of Alec’s hands cupping his ass.

He rocks back into it, wanting to feel more, wanting Alec’s hands to rub and squeeze and _bruise_ him, wants to feel his slaps and the impact but he knows he’ll have to leave this part for another day.

Still, he moans in relief when Alec obliges, squeezing him harder through the fabric, letting go of Magnus’ mouth in favour of nibbling at his earlobe and sucking at his neck. He’s pushing all of Magnus’ buttons at once, and Magnus is nothing if not relieved. He keeps rocking back on Alec’s touch, moaning with delight every time Alec squeezes harder and holds, letting him feel all of it. 

He yelps when Alec grabs his thighs and starts carrying him to the bedroom. Then he wraps his legs around Alec’s waist and laughs, and Alec’s never looked more delighted, with that smile of his that is as small as it is obvious. Magnus chuckles again and kisses him, and they almost stumble and fall with the way Alec forgets everything else and just kisses him back. Magnus giggles every time Alec almost falters, and soon the kiss is peppered on with their little laughs, laced with that kind of wet joy they can’t help pouring into it. It reminds Magnus of their first time, and it feels good to think of this memory in a context where it doesn’t hurt.

When his back touches the mattress, he’s almost shocked to remember there are things other than Alec in the room. The way he clutches to him harder is completely involuntary.

“It’s okay, Magnus,” Alec says, slowly, disentangling himself from Magnus’ hands so that he can go back to kissing and sucking at his neck, his hands moving slowly to unbutton Magnus’ shirt, like they have all the time in the world. Magnus doesn’t feel like they have any time at all. “It’s okay, I’m here, I’ve got you,” he kisses Magnus’ neck, and undoes another button, and lets his hands roam free under the fabric, alternating between running his whole palm on Magnus’ chest and circling his fingers slowly against Magnus’ skin, the press of his thumbs grounding and pleasurable and slowly unknotting something deep inside of Magnus. Then he kisses his neck again, and undoes another button, and it starts all over again. The slow repetition, the reverence, the care with which Alec touches him has him clenching his thighs in an attempt to feel the friction he needs, despite the fact that his spread legs make it impossible to actually feel the pressure on his clit. So he settles for trying to grind against Alec, moaning when he feels the pressure of Alec’s hard cock against him. Fuck, it feels so good already, and he’s nowhere near where he wants yet. He grinds harder, letting Alec’s cock rub against his clit through the layers of clothes, and Alec moans deliciously at that as he _finally_ takes off Magnus’ shirt.

It’s not a second after Magnus’ hands are out of the sleeves that he starts tugging at Alec’s shirt. Once it’s out, they roam free over Alec’s chest, feeling the soft hair that he knows increases Alec’s sensation when he touches him, rubbing lightly at Alec’s nipples, kissing and licking at his collarbone. He can feel Alec trying to get his hands under Magnus’ (unnecessarily tight) pants, and knows the fact that his legs are still hooked around Alec’s waist and that he’s still rocking against Alec doesn’t help, but he still doesn’t stop it, just like he doesn’t stop kissing Alec’s collarbone and running his hands over his chest and back. 

Or at least, not until he feels Alec tug at his hair. It’s like his whole body stops, taken over by the force of his whine. Fuck, he loves it when Alec grips his hair. 

Alec has the nerve to _smirk_ at him, and Magnus would complain, but Alec’s fist is still on his hair, pulling and tugging just the way he likes it, and once he undoes Magnus’ fly he immediately starts rubbing Magnus’ clit through the pants, and _fuck_ it feels so good.

“Take me,” Magnus whines, feeling almost helpless in the way Alec manhandles him, “come on Alec, come on, please, please, take me.” 

“I’ve got you,” Alec says, “it’s okay, baby, let it go, I’ve got you.” 

He’s still rubbing Magnus’ clit, and it feels good, but his pants are restricting Alec’s movements too much for his liking. And Magnus knows Alec likes the whole undressing thing, but he doesn’t have the time for this right now, so he magics both of their pants (and underwear) off. Alec doesn’t stop, almost thrusting against his clit now, hard and fast and wet with Magnus’ slick, and every time Magnus thrusts back into his hands he feels the tug at his hair get sharper, and he moans moans _moans_ as his cunt clenches around nothing, desperate for friction, and he squirts on Alec’s hand. 

It’s not enough.

Alec doesn’t even have the time to look smug - like he always does when he manages to make Magnus squirt - before Magnus is thrusting back again. “Come on, Alec, _please_, take me, want you, want to feel your cock, please.” 

Were it any other circumstance, he knows saying this would be like begging Alec to tease him, to deny him and make him beg harder, but he knows Alec is as desperate as he is, can see it in the speed of his movements, in the edge in his eyes. Alec slides his cock into Magnus’ cunt, and Magnus’ head throws back in pleasure.

He’s all over Magnus now, mouth on his neck and hand on his back and his cock finally inside, fucking him fast and hard, stretching his cunt and making it all the better when it clenches around him. Magnus sobs and moans and screams, back arching and head thrown back as he tries to meet Alec’s thrusts. He’s gripping Alec’s back again, holding him close and using him as support to fuck himself on Alec. He feels Alec’s hands slide down to squeeze his ass again, an intense kind of pleasure that almost dulls the rest of his body. Magnus can barely feel anything other than Alec’s cock hitting him inside, the almost possessive grab on his ass _holding_ him so Alec can fuck him better. “Gods, want you to bruise me,” he says without really planning to. 

It's worth it for the feel of Alec slapping his ass, though.

"Good?" Alec asks, "need more preparing?"

Magnus moans. "No, it's good, keep going, please."

"Okay," Alec says, slapping him again. This time he goes back to thrusting afterwards, the sting on Magnus' ass lingering and making the feel of his cock all the more delicious. "I love you so much, Magnus, Angel, I've missed you so bad."

It's a contrast, the way Alec whispers sweet nothings into his ear with the way he slaps him and fucks him. It makes tears prickle on Magnus' eyes. He wants the sensation, the sharp reassurance of _Alec_, not the hard pleasure of being used, and Alec knows that so easily. Gods, he really loves Alexander so much. 

"Don't ever wanna be without you again," Alec keeps on, and this time the tears do fall. He feels Alec squeeze his ass in reassurance once more, and moans at the sharp pain it sends. "Never, Magnus, I love you so much."

"I love you too," Magnus says, tears still falling, not letting himself let down the rhythm they're at, because it's so good, he feels so close. "I didn't think you'd come for me," he says, and it sounds like a confession, small and fragile. 

Alec sounds _hurt_. "Always, Magnus. Will always be there for you, as long you want me to." 

That makes Magnus falter. "You can't… Promise that." He says, a little shocked. Doesn't Alec know? If it were up to Magnus-

"I just did. I'm not leaving you again," Alec answers, and Magnus didn't notice their rhythm had changed, but Alec is fucking him slowly now, letting him feel the drag of every inch of Alec's cock, hear the soft noises of his slick as Alec nibbles at his neck. It's good, especially combined with the delicious ache on his ass, like his whole body is throbbing with the way Alec fucks him. Magnus can feel every second, every touch. Alec is _here_. "Never leaving you, Magnus."

"But you d-" he says, then stops himself. It feels like it was years ago, but at the same time it's like he didn't process it properly.

Alec makes a sound like he's been wounded, pained and desperate. "Never again," he says, "never again, Magnus, I'm sorry, never again." 

"It's okay," he says, because it hurt, but it is okay. They're gonna have the time to talk about it properly, but for now, what matters is that he knows Alec did it for him. That's what matters, for now.

Alec seems to understand that, because he just keeps it up, his slow, hard thrusts, as he smells Magnus' hair and moans. "I was gonna become a vampire," Alec says, "if Clary hadn't made the Alliance rune, if the others didn't help, I'd have made Simon turn me and go to live in Edom with you."

Magnus feels like he's gonna drown in his emotion. "That's a horrible plan," he chokes out. Alec just laughs. "What about Isabelle, what about-" 

Alec shushes him with a kiss, soft and good. His thrusts are almost sensuous now, slow and pointed, and Magnus feels like they're doing this whole thing in reverse. "Losing my siblings would be awful," he admits, "but _leaving_ you is the worst thing ever. I don't ever want to go where you can't follow. I don't ever wanna leave you," he says, and it sounds more like a promise than a confession. 

"Alexander," he says, eyes wide, because surely Alec can't mean what he thinks he means. 

"It's okay," Alec says, peppering kisses on his face again, then on his mouth, holding him down almost languidly as he kisses Magnus and explores his mouth, feels his warmness, grounds himself with him. "I know what I want, Magnus." 

"Okay," Magnus answers, because what else can he say? "Okay," he repeats, still in awe, and brings Alec down again so he can kiss him again, deep and franctic this time, and quickening the pace of his thrusts. 

Alec gets the hint, following through and rubbing Magnus' clit at the same place, until his moans mix with Magnus' screams, until the both of them get so lost in each other it's a surprise to open their eyes and find out they've come down from their orgasms. 

And how beautiful Magnus looks, sensitive and satisfied and happy, when he curls himself against Alec's chest and lets him take care of him.

*

When Magnus wakes up the next day, it's from an almost overwhelming amount of heat. He's all curled up on himself, and Alec is all curled up around him, dead to the world like he always is at this time of the morning. 

He swiftly disentangles himself from Alec, getting a little further to breathe, and then looks at him. Alec looks peaceful like he never has before, still curled up around a now imaginary Magnus. He feels himself itch to touch him, to make sure he's real again, so he slowly reaches out to stroke Alec's hair. 

He still doesn't quite know what to think of his and Alec's future, but he does know where to start.

**Author's Note:**

> let me know what you think, concrit is welcome


End file.
